Sunday 18 April 2010

The Perfect Life Partner!

No, this blog is not going to discuss about that paisa vasool Govinda-starrer laughter riot, but yes it attempts to be a more non-filmi take on the much used phrase. Offlate, I have noticed a good chunk of my near and dear ones getting married, mostly the arranged kinds where the girl’s family goes through the rubbish rigmarole of those lucrative matrimonial websites that boast of finding you the perfect life partner! Excuse my parlance but I seriously do not understand how a mere flashy decorative website could find you the man/woman of your dreams. No offense to those that have found their better halves this way, but my understanding of the institution of marriage stops me from accepting this just like that. I personally have nothing against these matrimonial sites and webpages but I simply fail to understand how families and particularly youngsters like me believe that something like this could get them what they want. In the recent past, when I found some of my own friends go through this process, most of them didn’t even know what they were looking for before they registered themselves onto one of those columns. And while filling up their profiles to be put up for the rest of the ‘bachelor’ janta, they did it like they were updating their facebook or orkut profile! They wanted to make it look all fancy and hep with their best looking pictures on display in the hope of catching some equally smart and good-looking bakra to tie the knot with.

If matrimony is just about finding guys/girls who match all the pre-requisites for an official marital status, then what about the ‘getting to know each other’ and the ‘matching of mental wavelengths’ bits. Ok, I may be sounding too critical about this. Yes, quite often, people scouting the matrimonial columns do get that golden chance to meet with their prospective halves to get to know each other better, but that’s merely a meeting or two which is equivalent to an evening coffee or an early morning stroll with a friend. Without sounding judgmental, that leaves hardly any space for the couple-to-be to know what the other is really made of! It’s obvious, as humans we always tend to put on our best face when we meet someone for the first time – more to do with creating that great first impression! In such circumstance, how does one really figure the true nature of a person?

We often associate the words ‘chemistry’ and ‘compatibility’ with couples. I think in practically every generation the stability of any couple is primarily determined by their so-called compatibility levels despite the societal (relatives, neighbors and the likes) emphasis on how well they look together or how conveniently can one support the other (financially I mean!). Well, there is sometimes a lot of pressure from parents and extended family on this front but I just wish people (ignore the generalization....again) today realized that this is not a matter of a few days/weeks/months but an entire lifetime and hence choose their partners after much consideration and thought.

1 comment:

  1. A very valid argument..but there is another school of thought which propagates the idea that, given that the basic criteria of expectations from a partner are met while bride / groom hunting, the curiosity contained in knowing the partner post marriage is exciting..if it unveils to be pleasant and meets the expectations it triggers the spark for a to-be prosperous married life..if not the disapointment can be toned down through effective use of compromise etc...on the contrary, in a love marriage when there is nothing left to be revealed about the partner, the unknown side of the partner which is revealed after the marriage is more often than not the side that the other person wouldn't want to see..and this largely cannot be resolved through compromise etc because ego acts as a huge road-block here....both points of view are debatable thou...nice blog btw..

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